Monday, June 18, 2012
Beta Day
So I know I haven't posted anything since my transfer but I have been unbelievably busy!!! In fact, just got back from wedding in California. It was nice and it helped keep my mind off of things. Also not much as really happen as far as transfer. This time I decided not to POAS and for me personally, it was the best decision I ever made. Symptom wise not much to write home about breasts look pretty much the same as they always do, maybe the slightest of tenderness but not sure if that is because I keep checking!!! They do ache on the sides though. On the 6th and 7th day pass transfer I had quite a bit of cramping and lower back pain. Now you have to remember some people say these are good signs but are bodies are so full of meds they like to play tricks on us. But for me the lack of change in appearance in the breasts is not a good sign. We will see though. Had blood drawn at 8:15 AM and they said I would here back from them between 1 and 4!!! Part me wishes they would hurry up and call and the other part doesn't want my PUPO status to end. Will update later.
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
PUPO!!!
Well when they called me back for the transfer Kev had not made it to the clinic. So it was just me and the staff. It went well and was told both embryos thawed beautifully. They even printed a copy of the ultrasound with the two little embies safe inside me so Kev could see them. So as of today I am PUPO with twins!!!!!
Scheduling Conflicts
So yesterday I missed a call from the lab. On my voice-mail it said to call Sara back ASAP!!! Of course many things are running through my mind, mainly something has happened to all of my embryos. Waiting for Sara to get to the phone seemed to take an eternity! Well...
Dr. C needed to change my time to earlier. Sigh of relief, heart slowing down & feeling much better. The only problem is my acupuncturist was going to be doing my accupumcture at the facility but now was unable to. However, I could go to his office and have it done and my clinic was cool about me being a few minutes late. Second problem, my daughter and step-son needed to be dropped off at the church for a 4 day pioneer Trek at the same time I need to be at the clinic. Driving there. It a problem but I didn't want to drive home since my car has a 12 inch lift and don't really want to be climbing in and out of it after transfer. A friend of ours is coming with him so he can drive my car back home. Problems solved, then I have to wait a little bit to do my follow up acupuncture. There is a possibility that Kev might not make in with me. Oh well not every lady can say she got knocked up by her husband who wasn't even in the same room!!! Ha ha ha
Well now I sit and wait and soon I will be PUPO with twins!
Monday, June 4, 2012
PIO 101
So this cycle I am taking my PIO shots in the evening, reasoning this is what they have on the schedule and although I know it doesn't make a difference just the idea of doing something different this round gives me a sense of comfort. Besides I have found doing them in the evening I have a better contol of the timing. Last 3 cycles when I had them done in the morning they were done at 8 AM 9 AM and when Kev's one caregiver who came in twice a week I would have them done at 4:30 AM. Now my RE gently told me at all my WTF appointments that this was not the cause of my failures and there is enough in my system to have wide gaps like that. However, I still clearly remember the embyologist say ( I was on vaginal progesterone cream as well), if I do the shot at 8 in the morning then do the cream at 8 in the evening and repeat each day at same time. My RE says that is just his personality, but that still small voice says this could have caused your problems Francine!!! AAAHHH Although I am not as anal about the time being exact it is within the hour.
Now I think most people receive their PIO shot from their husbands or significant others. Well as you know Kev is a quad and is physically unable to do them so I rely on a few good friends who are not needle squeemish. The problem is that we are going out of town for a family reunion (Kev's side) and they don't know I'm doing this and not comfortable with askingthem to give the shot. This is of course if I have a successful cycle but not going to get into that right now (one day at a time). Anyway my IVF coordinator showed me how to give them to myself although she said one side will be more awkard (left side for me) than the other. She even drew little circles so I knew where to stick the needle!!! Oh Yeah!!! Well I got my first opportunity on Sat to try this out myself since we were going to a wedding and I had to be there at 5 and I do my shot between 6 and 7. Now I like to think that I have gotten over my needle phobia as a child. I have given myself countless injections but those were subcutaneous meaning they are just under the skin with pretty tiny needles. However, the PIO shots are intramuscular with inch and a half needle injected into the muscle!!! Basically Big Scary Needle!!!!! I was hoping that my first time would be in the privacy of my bathroom with Kev there giving me moral support. Instead I was in a public ladies room with my dress (yeah didn't think that through) tucked under my bra so it would be out of the way and my undies pulled down on the side. Who comes in but a woman with her little girl as I am trying to do this. I' sure you all have a lovely mental image of this now. The look of embarassment on my face hers was shock and wariness. Of course I can't hurry it along either the stuff is in oil and goes in pretty slow. I could hear the little girl asking her mom what I was doing and the mom trying to sshhh her daughter. Fun times right?!?!?! Oh well It is what it is.
I can now proudly say I have given the shots to myself twice!!! However, I notived that with tonights injection it seemed like I had some leakage of the medicine after pulling the syringe out. I have been assured by other ladies that this this happens sometimes and that I still got most of the medicine. Still one ore thing to worry about right?!?!
Two more days, well less if you want to count down in hours until my transfer!!!! Can't believe it is here already!!!!
Now I think most people receive their PIO shot from their husbands or significant others. Well as you know Kev is a quad and is physically unable to do them so I rely on a few good friends who are not needle squeemish. The problem is that we are going out of town for a family reunion (Kev's side) and they don't know I'm doing this and not comfortable with askingthem to give the shot. This is of course if I have a successful cycle but not going to get into that right now (one day at a time). Anyway my IVF coordinator showed me how to give them to myself although she said one side will be more awkard (left side for me) than the other. She even drew little circles so I knew where to stick the needle!!! Oh Yeah!!! Well I got my first opportunity on Sat to try this out myself since we were going to a wedding and I had to be there at 5 and I do my shot between 6 and 7. Now I like to think that I have gotten over my needle phobia as a child. I have given myself countless injections but those were subcutaneous meaning they are just under the skin with pretty tiny needles. However, the PIO shots are intramuscular with inch and a half needle injected into the muscle!!! Basically Big Scary Needle!!!!! I was hoping that my first time would be in the privacy of my bathroom with Kev there giving me moral support. Instead I was in a public ladies room with my dress (yeah didn't think that through) tucked under my bra so it would be out of the way and my undies pulled down on the side. Who comes in but a woman with her little girl as I am trying to do this. I' sure you all have a lovely mental image of this now. The look of embarassment on my face hers was shock and wariness. Of course I can't hurry it along either the stuff is in oil and goes in pretty slow. I could hear the little girl asking her mom what I was doing and the mom trying to sshhh her daughter. Fun times right?!?!?! Oh well It is what it is.
I can now proudly say I have given the shots to myself twice!!! However, I notived that with tonights injection it seemed like I had some leakage of the medicine after pulling the syringe out. I have been assured by other ladies that this this happens sometimes and that I still got most of the medicine. Still one ore thing to worry about right?!?!
Two more days, well less if you want to count down in hours until my transfer!!!! Can't believe it is here already!!!!
Saturday, May 26, 2012
BLAH!!!
So this cycle the lupron has been kicking the you know what out of me!!! The headaches I have been experiencing have been debilitating. Needless to say I have been spending my time in a cool dark room, no sound, no light! It probably hasn't helped that we have been in the last weeks of school (Today was the last!!!) and I have been working with my son trying to help him get his grades up (he did!!!). Also Arizona heat does not help a woman who is experiencing menopausal symptoms as a result of the lupron!!!! I swear one day I am going to be one of those annoying snowbirds that lives down here only in the winter and spring months and live up north for the summer!!!!
However, today is the last day of LUPRON!!!!!!! YEAH!!!! CHEER CLAP!!!!
I started a new drug called G-CSF, of course it is an injection, got to stick with me with more needles. This is an interesting drug and is fairly new to world of IVF. It is not however, a new drug it has been used on cancer patients undergoing chemo as it helps build up their white blood cell count. For fertility uses studies have shown that it helps in building up the uterine lining, aids in implantation, and may help prevent miscarriage. Hey I'm up for it if it results in a healthy pregnancy and baby!!!! One of the side effects however is bone pain. For me it has not been so much of a pain but more of a constant ache. I feel like a little old lady shuffling around because of my aching bones!!!! Oh well what can I say but all in the name of a baby (or two 2 (; )
However, today is the last day of LUPRON!!!!!!! YEAH!!!! CHEER CLAP!!!!
I started a new drug called G-CSF, of course it is an injection, got to stick with me with more needles. This is an interesting drug and is fairly new to world of IVF. It is not however, a new drug it has been used on cancer patients undergoing chemo as it helps build up their white blood cell count. For fertility uses studies have shown that it helps in building up the uterine lining, aids in implantation, and may help prevent miscarriage. Hey I'm up for it if it results in a healthy pregnancy and baby!!!! One of the side effects however is bone pain. For me it has not been so much of a pain but more of a constant ache. I feel like a little old lady shuffling around because of my aching bones!!!! Oh well what can I say but all in the name of a baby (or two 2 (; )
Saturday, May 12, 2012
LUPRON BLUES
Thursday, May 10, 2012
BAD ME!!!!!!
Wow I am a terrible terrible person!!! I could have sworn that I had posted my results of my last IVF but wow, 2DP4DT was my last post, unacceptable!!! Well that one was a bust, but I had already suspected it!!! Went through the regular emotions: sadness, pity, anger, new hope in the next cycle.
Anyways gearing up for a FET scheduled for June 6, 2012, hoping and praying that this one sticks and decides to hang around for the next several months!!! I have been taking the oh so lovely BCP, many may think that this is no big deal but man do they mess with my emotions. I got into an argument with my GP financial clerk over my insurance card and thought she was rude and that I was being verbally attacked. I demanded an apology which she refused and then told me to go sit!!!! What am I DOG?!?!?! Yes I did say this to her!!!! Threaten to kick me out of the Dr. office but my wonderful Dr who is also a family friend smoothed it all out.
Tomorrow I get to start my Lupron shots!!! Woot Woot!!!!
Lost 28 pounds in the last few months and ready to get this show on the road!!!!
Lets hope that 2012 is a great year and that 2013 will be even better with a baby or two in my arms!!!!!
Anyways gearing up for a FET scheduled for June 6, 2012, hoping and praying that this one sticks and decides to hang around for the next several months!!! I have been taking the oh so lovely BCP, many may think that this is no big deal but man do they mess with my emotions. I got into an argument with my GP financial clerk over my insurance card and thought she was rude and that I was being verbally attacked. I demanded an apology which she refused and then told me to go sit!!!! What am I DOG?!?!?! Yes I did say this to her!!!! Threaten to kick me out of the Dr. office but my wonderful Dr who is also a family friend smoothed it all out.
Tomorrow I get to start my Lupron shots!!! Woot Woot!!!!
Lost 28 pounds in the last few months and ready to get this show on the road!!!!
Lets hope that 2012 is a great year and that 2013 will be even better with a baby or two in my arms!!!!!
Thursday, November 3, 2011
2DP4DT
Is it just me or is the time just ticking by slowly?!?!?! So am now two days into my transfer and still not much to report. Not that I don't try to read into everything. I am still having cramping and hoping that it is a good but dreading that it is not. No urge to POAS yet but I am sure as the days go on that old feeling will return. I have been staring intently at my breasts. Now I am not vain (at least I don't think I am) and it is not like I have the small perky bouncy breasts of a 20 year old who has never had children. But I remember in my first cycle veins starting to pop especially around the aureole (Not going to say this is TMI because it is my blog and it is happening to my body besides it can be very informative for other women who think that they are going crazy during this wait). Unfortunately I didn't document my experiences then and not sure when it first was noticeable. Oh well as of right now sometimes I think the ta tas look different other times not so much. I know not much help but it is still very early.
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
1DP4DT
Well as you can imagine nothing much to report. I am on bed rest or as I like to say "Princess Status". I am getting a little stir crazy, laying here with my feet propped up and who knows what is going on with the rest of the house?!?!?! I know the kitchen must be a disaster but I am going to try and not think about it. I really think my left ovary is upset about this whole process because I went to turn on my side and got a terrible sharp pain there.At least it didn't last long.
Well like I said not much happening, just lots of prayers.
Well like I said not much happening, just lots of prayers.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Transfer Day..... Maybe
This is has been a hectic Halloween weekend and I just have not had the time nor the energy to write. Kids had a fall festival/trunk or treat on Friday, on Saturday Courtney had a Halloween Party and on Sunday we went over to Kev's mom's house for Family Home Evening. Lots of fun but no time for much of anything else.
Anyway I got my fertility report. Out of 21 eggs 17 were mature and 13 fertilized. Woo Hoo lucky number 13!!!! I said to the embryologist well that sounds good and he just said well they could still all die!!! Thanks for being my Debbie Downer. He also said there were some brown areas on some of my eggs but didn't explain what this could possibly mean, Thanks!!! So he goes on to say that he is scheduling me for a transfer Tuesday at 11:45 but it probably isn't going to happen because my Re had written on the paper Freeze ALL! What?!?!?! I asked why and he didn't know just to show up today and we will see what happens. Now since this all happened on Weekend I could not get in contact with my clinic since they are open on Weekends by appointment only. All weekend I worried, my Re never said anything about freezing them when we talked to him and I don't like being in the dark. So first thing Monday morning I called and there phones had not been switched on yet. At 8:17 AM I got through and left a message. 6 hours and 5 minutes later I finally got a call, (yes I was getting a little anxious). Evidently, if you remember I was too excited to get my E2level on trigger day. Well I guess it was over 3,000 and when it starts to get that high he sometimes feels it is better to freeze everything and do a Frozen transfer later because success rates could be better. Now it may not happen for sure because I guess I am in an iffy area, if my E2 had been over 5,000 then it would definitely happen. So basically we are going to get there and he is going to make a decision then. I don't know what he is going to base the decision on because he is not doing any blood tests. I have a feeling that it is not going to happen today and yes I am a little bummed but I am praying hard that it will so we will see.
To be continued......
....and the story continues
Well went in hoping for the best but prepared for a postponement. I mean every time before when I would go in for my transfer it didn't happen today. Usually slow growing embryos, this time could be the E2 levels or who knows what. So I got there changed into my scrubs and was behind one other couple. As I am drinking my water I accidently dropped the bottle and spilt water all down my gown (can we say butterfingers) I had to change my gown and let me tell not easy going into bathroom when your bladder is screaming at you to pee! Shortly after I got changed the nurse said that they were readt for me!!!! What?!?!?!?! No RE coming telling me we should post pone this? surely this can't be real. They wouldn't actually take me back to the OR and then tell me would they??? I didn't think so since they would have to sterilize the room again.
Got in there put my legs in the tortuture room style stirrups and then the embryologist came in. I have to say he is much nicer and pleasant in person. The language barrier is much broader over the phone. So what would he have to tell me. Different scenarios flashed in an instant before my eyes one of course one that every woman going through this fears.. none of your embryos have made it. Instead he smiles, (is this a good sign or a sympathy smile) and says your embryos look really good this time and looks like we may have about 6 to freeze which could now go along with my one frozen embryo left over from my last fresh cycle. Of course I will get a full report and know more later as to how many were frozen which will be done either today or tomorrow. But two great looking embryos were put back into me and it amazing watching those bubbles appear on the ultrasound! The RE was very happy and gave me a good % for success but of course I know anything can happen but right now happy and PUPO with twins!!!!
I call tomorrow to schedule my Beta which is on 11/11/11 hmmmm??? Lucky numbers?? Maybe I should ask to have my Beta time at 11:00 AM I don't know though cuz I have to see what the cut off time is for getting the results the same day!
Let the 2 week wait begin!!!!!
Anyway I got my fertility report. Out of 21 eggs 17 were mature and 13 fertilized. Woo Hoo lucky number 13!!!! I said to the embryologist well that sounds good and he just said well they could still all die!!! Thanks for being my Debbie Downer. He also said there were some brown areas on some of my eggs but didn't explain what this could possibly mean, Thanks!!! So he goes on to say that he is scheduling me for a transfer Tuesday at 11:45 but it probably isn't going to happen because my Re had written on the paper Freeze ALL! What?!?!?! I asked why and he didn't know just to show up today and we will see what happens. Now since this all happened on Weekend I could not get in contact with my clinic since they are open on Weekends by appointment only. All weekend I worried, my Re never said anything about freezing them when we talked to him and I don't like being in the dark. So first thing Monday morning I called and there phones had not been switched on yet. At 8:17 AM I got through and left a message. 6 hours and 5 minutes later I finally got a call, (yes I was getting a little anxious). Evidently, if you remember I was too excited to get my E2level on trigger day. Well I guess it was over 3,000 and when it starts to get that high he sometimes feels it is better to freeze everything and do a Frozen transfer later because success rates could be better. Now it may not happen for sure because I guess I am in an iffy area, if my E2 had been over 5,000 then it would definitely happen. So basically we are going to get there and he is going to make a decision then. I don't know what he is going to base the decision on because he is not doing any blood tests. I have a feeling that it is not going to happen today and yes I am a little bummed but I am praying hard that it will so we will see.
To be continued......
....and the story continues
Well went in hoping for the best but prepared for a postponement. I mean every time before when I would go in for my transfer it didn't happen today. Usually slow growing embryos, this time could be the E2 levels or who knows what. So I got there changed into my scrubs and was behind one other couple. As I am drinking my water I accidently dropped the bottle and spilt water all down my gown (can we say butterfingers) I had to change my gown and let me tell not easy going into bathroom when your bladder is screaming at you to pee! Shortly after I got changed the nurse said that they were readt for me!!!! What?!?!?!?! No RE coming telling me we should post pone this? surely this can't be real. They wouldn't actually take me back to the OR and then tell me would they??? I didn't think so since they would have to sterilize the room again.
Got in there put my legs in the tortuture room style stirrups and then the embryologist came in. I have to say he is much nicer and pleasant in person. The language barrier is much broader over the phone. So what would he have to tell me. Different scenarios flashed in an instant before my eyes one of course one that every woman going through this fears.. none of your embryos have made it. Instead he smiles, (is this a good sign or a sympathy smile) and says your embryos look really good this time and looks like we may have about 6 to freeze which could now go along with my one frozen embryo left over from my last fresh cycle. Of course I will get a full report and know more later as to how many were frozen which will be done either today or tomorrow. But two great looking embryos were put back into me and it amazing watching those bubbles appear on the ultrasound! The RE was very happy and gave me a good % for success but of course I know anything can happen but right now happy and PUPO with twins!!!!
I call tomorrow to schedule my Beta which is on 11/11/11 hmmmm??? Lucky numbers?? Maybe I should ask to have my Beta time at 11:00 AM I don't know though cuz I have to see what the cut off time is for getting the results the same day!
Let the 2 week wait begin!!!!!
Friday, October 28, 2011
EGG RETRIEVAL
So sitting getting ready to take an oxycodone. I don't remember hurting as much with my others but it could be that they got 21 EGGS from me!!!!!! Usually they tell me how many were mature after I wake up but did not do that this this time and of course that makes worry, (don't like changes I guess). But generally besides the pain I am in good spirits, I figure there has got to be at least, (and I hope more) one good mature egg in there. Tomorrow I will get the call from the embryologist to let me know how many mature ones there were and how many fertilized. Crossing fingers and saying lots of prayers, this is completely out of my hands and I have learn to come to accept that.
Well I am going to take my loopy drugs now, sleep sounds wonderful right now!
Well I am going to take my loopy drugs now, sleep sounds wonderful right now!
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Changes
Sorry I haven't been around, been so busy and last night when I went t sit down and type our Internet service was down :(
Here is my 11 and 12 days of stims
Day 11
E2 - 1995
R. Ovary 6 follicles measuring: 13, 14.4 14.5, 15, 16.4, 18.4
L. Ovary 8 follicles measuring: 11, 12, 13, 13, 14.6, 16, 17, 18.5
Because I now had follicles that were over 16 I finally got to graduated to daily pokes and prods. No change in meds.
Day 12
E2 - 2,806
R. Ovary 6 follicles measuring: 13, 14, 15.6, 16, 17, 21
L. Ovary 8 follicles measuring: 11.4, 11.5, 13.5, 17.4, 18, 18, 18, 20
They also told me my progesterone (something they never had before) 2.50. She said that was good they like to see anything under 3. To me of course I am thinking that is awfully close to 3. I also had two follicles that were measured smaller. Now as I have said before I believe it can be human error , (they were not that much smaller) but I did find out that follicles can in fact shrink due to not being stimulated enough (another follicle is eating more basically) and they can shrink and eventually get reabsorb. Great another thing for me to worry about!!!! Got to have something I guess.
Well I got the call (not to trigger) but to change my meds. Wow I was beginning to think I was the only one who never changed. I didn't have to take my follistim last night and I took my regular menopur last night. This morning though I took the same follistim but upped my menopur to 2 cc's. that is two vials of powder to one solution. Can I just say OUCH!!!! I definitely burned a lot more.
Well I will update later on today's results. Fingers crossed that my follies are still growing!! Might trigger tonight or tomorrow!!
UPDATE:
IT'S TRIGGER TIME
Got the call a little while ago, that I am in fact triggering tonight at 6:00 PM!!! I go in on Friday October 28, for a 6:00 AM retrieval.
Forgot to ask what my E2 level was (too excited).
R. Ovary 7 follicles measuring: 6, 12, 15.5, 17, 17, 19, 24
L. Ovary 10 follicles measuring: 9, 11.5, 13, 17, 17, 18, 20, 20, 21
Couple of extra ones in there I am sure the 6 and 9 won't be any good but hopefully I got some good sized in there that will have some good quality eggs in them!!
So right now watching the clock like a hawk, even though I have my alarm set and ready!! Luckily my trigger shot is subcutaneous (basically small needle just under the skin) as opposed to intramuscular (long needle into the muscle). Before I do that I have to do 300 IU of follistim. As always it is out of my hands and if one or more of these eggs are meant to fertilize and be my future baby/ies then it will happen.
Here is my 11 and 12 days of stims
Day 11
E2 - 1995
R. Ovary 6 follicles measuring: 13, 14.4 14.5, 15, 16.4, 18.4
L. Ovary 8 follicles measuring: 11, 12, 13, 13, 14.6, 16, 17, 18.5
Because I now had follicles that were over 16 I finally got to graduated to daily pokes and prods. No change in meds.
Day 12
E2 - 2,806
R. Ovary 6 follicles measuring: 13, 14, 15.6, 16, 17, 21
L. Ovary 8 follicles measuring: 11.4, 11.5, 13.5, 17.4, 18, 18, 18, 20
They also told me my progesterone (something they never had before) 2.50. She said that was good they like to see anything under 3. To me of course I am thinking that is awfully close to 3. I also had two follicles that were measured smaller. Now as I have said before I believe it can be human error , (they were not that much smaller) but I did find out that follicles can in fact shrink due to not being stimulated enough (another follicle is eating more basically) and they can shrink and eventually get reabsorb. Great another thing for me to worry about!!!! Got to have something I guess.
Well I got the call (not to trigger) but to change my meds. Wow I was beginning to think I was the only one who never changed. I didn't have to take my follistim last night and I took my regular menopur last night. This morning though I took the same follistim but upped my menopur to 2 cc's. that is two vials of powder to one solution. Can I just say OUCH!!!! I definitely burned a lot more.
Well I will update later on today's results. Fingers crossed that my follies are still growing!! Might trigger tonight or tomorrow!!
UPDATE:
IT'S TRIGGER TIME
Got the call a little while ago, that I am in fact triggering tonight at 6:00 PM!!! I go in on Friday October 28, for a 6:00 AM retrieval.
Forgot to ask what my E2 level was (too excited).
R. Ovary 7 follicles measuring: 6, 12, 15.5, 17, 17, 19, 24
L. Ovary 10 follicles measuring: 9, 11.5, 13, 17, 17, 18, 20, 20, 21
Couple of extra ones in there I am sure the 6 and 9 won't be any good but hopefully I got some good sized in there that will have some good quality eggs in them!!
So right now watching the clock like a hawk, even though I have my alarm set and ready!! Luckily my trigger shot is subcutaneous (basically small needle just under the skin) as opposed to intramuscular (long needle into the muscle). Before I do that I have to do 300 IU of follistim. As always it is out of my hands and if one or more of these eggs are meant to fertilize and be my future baby/ies then it will happen.
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Follicle Confusion
So on day 9 of stims I went in for my blood work and ultrasounds and the nurse was having trouble finding my vein. She said that she would get someone else to draw me if she couldn't find it because she didn't feel comfortable, she kept poking (with her finger) and finally said I think I found it, my reply was that you better do more than think. She said were going to go for it and I closed my eyes and grimaced but fortunately I didn't feel a thing and she got it. She better count herself lucky though because I am not in the best of moods. On Friday I drove to the other side of town for my old high school's homecoming game and to see my dear sweet daughter, Whitney in the hospital. She still is in a lot of pain when the morphine wears off and is very flushed in the face when I bent down to give her a hug and kiss I could feel the heat radiating off her whole body. I was very alarmed and when the nurse came in to give her the pain meds I asked. I think she said it had been a couple of hours since they had given her Tylenol for her last fever and she said that it had not yet kicked, (Never heard of Tylenol taking that long), she than gave some BS story about how the heat is just on the outside and is not her core temperature and how you can not tell someone has fever from touching them because our body temperature is lower. I do realize that if your hands are really cold you are not going to get a good reading but when the heat is coming from their whole body and they are not covered up with blankets they have a temperature. I personally think that the shift was changing and crappy nurse did not want to be bothered. So in fact my daughter did have a high temperature again when the new nurse came in to check it, (AAAAHHHH). Anyways today she just got released. Today she is finally be released, (YEAH) and we just found out that she had e coli which was causing her kidneys to be impacted. I am so glad she went in when she did because that is something you just don't want to mess with.My asthma starting acting up on my way home from the homecoming game and I forgot my inhaler so I stopped off at my mom's to borrow hers. I kept hearing a noise from my car sounded like a hissing noise. But my tires looked find still had a great tread. I left my mom's with my two younger kids to drive the 45 minutes home. Probably about 10 minutes after I left my mom's I heard a THUMP THUMP THUMP noise and knew I had blown my tire. It was completely shredded. I had to wait for AAA to get there change the tire out on my beast of a car with a donut tire. By the time I got into bed it was 1:45 AM!!!! BLAH I am getting to old to be up this late. I had to get up for my 8:30 AM appointment with my clinic!!
So here are the results for day 9 of stims:
E2 1,260
R. Ovary 6 follicles measuring: 9.51, 9.83, 10.23, 11.72, 11.96, 14.96
L. Ovary 9 follicles measuring: 7.06, 7.65, 9.44, 9.97, 10.9, 11.39, 12.56, 13.03, 14.17
So some people might be alarmed or confused since my right ovary shows one less. Did I have a vanishing follicle? Where did it go? The thing is there can be some discrepancies when measuring follicles especially when done by a different person. It is doubtful that one has vanished but possible scenarios include that the previous tech could have accidentally counted it twice, or the new tech could have missed it. Either one of these is possible follicles can be clustered together some hidden behind others where it makes counting them difficult. I am not too worried about I know I have right in that general area. I was a little concern that they may not have grown enough. With my other two cycles I was already at daily blood draws and ultrasounds because I had at least one follicle at or above 16 mm. When the nurse called me back to tell that I am still to stay on the same protocol, I voiced my concern. She said that things seem nicely for me and that more importantly my follicles are close in size right and that it seems that each visit I have acquired new ones. So I am putting all negative thoughts away because it really is out of my hands. I go back in tomorrow and we will see how those follies are doing. Come on FOLLIES GROW!!!!!
Well I am going to bed now, haven't had much sleep in the past two days with everything that happened on Friday and then last night I went to my 20 year reunion!!!! AM I really that old?!?!?!?! It was a blast but my body and mind are just exhausted I need to get some sleep!
So here are the results for day 9 of stims:
E2 1,260
R. Ovary 6 follicles measuring: 9.51, 9.83, 10.23, 11.72, 11.96, 14.96
L. Ovary 9 follicles measuring: 7.06, 7.65, 9.44, 9.97, 10.9, 11.39, 12.56, 13.03, 14.17
So some people might be alarmed or confused since my right ovary shows one less. Did I have a vanishing follicle? Where did it go? The thing is there can be some discrepancies when measuring follicles especially when done by a different person. It is doubtful that one has vanished but possible scenarios include that the previous tech could have accidentally counted it twice, or the new tech could have missed it. Either one of these is possible follicles can be clustered together some hidden behind others where it makes counting them difficult. I am not too worried about I know I have right in that general area. I was a little concern that they may not have grown enough. With my other two cycles I was already at daily blood draws and ultrasounds because I had at least one follicle at or above 16 mm. When the nurse called me back to tell that I am still to stay on the same protocol, I voiced my concern. She said that things seem nicely for me and that more importantly my follicles are close in size right and that it seems that each visit I have acquired new ones. So I am putting all negative thoughts away because it really is out of my hands. I go back in tomorrow and we will see how those follies are doing. Come on FOLLIES GROW!!!!!
Well I am going to bed now, haven't had much sleep in the past two days with everything that happened on Friday and then last night I went to my 20 year reunion!!!! AM I really that old?!?!?!?! It was a blast but my body and mind are just exhausted I need to get some sleep!
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Day 7 of Stims
Today is day 7 of Stims and how am I feeling; moody, crampy, & fatigued. My stomach is not too badly bruised but you can play connect the dot with all the needle pokes. So I went in two days ago for my blood work and ultrasound. Now I do not have that days E2 level but I do have my baseline and 3 days of stim level
Baseline: 44.4
Day 3: 102
I was told that the numbers going up was a good sign. As far as follicles well as you know I have been on a more aggressive protocol to hopefully produce more eggs. This is what they found for day 5:
R. Ovary 4 follicles measuring: 4, 6, 6.5, 7
L. Ovary 4 follicles measuring: 6, 6.5, 7, 8
Alright so not to say I am not happy that I have some follicles in there but this is my lowest count to start and smallest follicles to start as compared to my previous cycles. I know I know I really should take my own advice and not compare but it is so hard. Also later on I called my IVF coordinator to find out if my meds would be changing at all because if not I was going to order some more. She said I am staying on the same meds but now instead of wanting to see me on Friday they want to see me Thursday which is today. I can't help but be worried that there is something amiss but I guess today will tell. Praying that my E2 levels are still going up and that my follies are getting nice and plump with maybe a few more follies that have come to join the party. I will update later today.
UPDATE:
Alright so I know this sounds weird and all but I had been nervous because I haven't had any cervical mucus otherwise known as egg white cervical mucus (EWCM). Most women worry when they have this during the stimming process of IVF, worrying that they are ovulating and that their cycle will be a bust. However, from my past experiences with this I now know it is something to expect. Was also told that it happens with the rising estrogen in the body. But I have been dry as old chewed up bone, which of course got be thinking that maybe my estrogen was not rising. Anyways when I go to the clinic they have you empty your bladder and low and behold when I wiped there it was. I did my little happy dance in the bathroom because it made me feel that this cycle is going at least in the right direction. I asked the nurse after my blood was drawn what my E2 level was on Tues (day 5 of stims) 247 so Yeah it is going up!!!
My E2 level for today is 694
My follicles:
R. Ovary 7 follicles measuring: 7, 7, 9, 9.5, 11.5, 12, 12
L. Ovary 7 follicles measuring: 5, 9, 9, 10, 11, 11, 14
I am to stay on the same protocol (oh Yeah) until Sat when I go in for another stab and poke. I am starting to feel better about this cycle. But of course with all the hormones I am on my mood can change instantly.
On another subject my oldest baby (Whitney) is in the hospital. She woke up with severe pain. They though it was a appendicitis but she has a severe bladder infection that has now gone to her kidneys as well as possibly having kidney stones. It is so hard when your kids are sick no matter how old they are. They told her the infection was so bad that if she had left it too much longer it could have killed her. Those words are parent never wants to hear. She is doing better now got her doped up on morphine and running antibiotics through her system.
Baseline: 44.4
Day 3: 102
I was told that the numbers going up was a good sign. As far as follicles well as you know I have been on a more aggressive protocol to hopefully produce more eggs. This is what they found for day 5:
R. Ovary 4 follicles measuring: 4, 6, 6.5, 7
L. Ovary 4 follicles measuring: 6, 6.5, 7, 8
Alright so not to say I am not happy that I have some follicles in there but this is my lowest count to start and smallest follicles to start as compared to my previous cycles. I know I know I really should take my own advice and not compare but it is so hard. Also later on I called my IVF coordinator to find out if my meds would be changing at all because if not I was going to order some more. She said I am staying on the same meds but now instead of wanting to see me on Friday they want to see me Thursday which is today. I can't help but be worried that there is something amiss but I guess today will tell. Praying that my E2 levels are still going up and that my follies are getting nice and plump with maybe a few more follies that have come to join the party. I will update later today.
UPDATE:
Alright so I know this sounds weird and all but I had been nervous because I haven't had any cervical mucus otherwise known as egg white cervical mucus (EWCM). Most women worry when they have this during the stimming process of IVF, worrying that they are ovulating and that their cycle will be a bust. However, from my past experiences with this I now know it is something to expect. Was also told that it happens with the rising estrogen in the body. But I have been dry as old chewed up bone, which of course got be thinking that maybe my estrogen was not rising. Anyways when I go to the clinic they have you empty your bladder and low and behold when I wiped there it was. I did my little happy dance in the bathroom because it made me feel that this cycle is going at least in the right direction. I asked the nurse after my blood was drawn what my E2 level was on Tues (day 5 of stims) 247 so Yeah it is going up!!!
My E2 level for today is 694
My follicles:
R. Ovary 7 follicles measuring: 7, 7, 9, 9.5, 11.5, 12, 12
L. Ovary 7 follicles measuring: 5, 9, 9, 10, 11, 11, 14
I am to stay on the same protocol (oh Yeah) until Sat when I go in for another stab and poke. I am starting to feel better about this cycle. But of course with all the hormones I am on my mood can change instantly.
On another subject my oldest baby (Whitney) is in the hospital. She woke up with severe pain. They though it was a appendicitis but she has a severe bladder infection that has now gone to her kidneys as well as possibly having kidney stones. It is so hard when your kids are sick no matter how old they are. They told her the infection was so bad that if she had left it too much longer it could have killed her. Those words are parent never wants to hear. She is doing better now got her doped up on morphine and running antibiotics through her system.
Thursday, October 13, 2011
The Lupron Blues
Today is day 6 of taking Lupron and I am just feeling cruddy. It is hard to explain sometimes how I feel but all I know is that I am Feeling not like me. The headaches (knocking on wood) have let up but have now been replaced with total unrelenting fatigue. Multiple naps have become a daily ritual and I still have to go to bed early. It gets so bad that I can barely keep my eyes open. In fact I am laying on the bed in my hotel room in Vegas after waking from one of my naps while Kev is playing Craps down in the casino (hope he is not losing too much money). Tomorrow I get to reduce my lupron from 10 iu to 5 and I start on follistim. Woo Hoo!!! Now I am usually more vigilant with my IVF calendar but Kev notice something that I missed. On the calendar it says that I am to take 200 iu of follistim which at first I was a little confused because last time I talked to my RE he had said that he apologizes to my ovaries now but he wanted to be more aggressive and try to get more eggs. However two iu was less than what I took last time but my dear darling husband noticed that this time around I am taking it twice a day for a total of 400 ius and the same thing when I start the menopur on Sunday (75 iu twice daily) for a total of 150 ius!!!! Wholy Moley!!!! Let's hope they get some good eggies out of there!!!!!
Saturday, October 8, 2011
And It Begins
I know technically I have been on the pill and gearing up for this cycle for a couple of weeks now but yesterday I started Lupron, (the injection that basically puts me in temporary menopause) and I never quite feel like I have started until I start poking myself with needles. Not to be bragging or anything but I am starting to feel like a pro with these needles. This is coming from a girl who had a deep phobia of needles and would actually have panic attacks when blood was drawn. I feel I can practically do these in my sleep now. I have come a long way baby!!!!So now I am on day 2 of lupron and already experiencing some of the side effects. Hot hot hot and no I am not talking about my rocking body which by the way I have dropped 20 pounds (can I hear a Woot Woot) Hot flashes are not as much fun. Last night Kev was so cold he had me put two blankets which he even put his head under and there I was wearing as little as possible practically dying because I was so hot. I even tried to turn the fan on but Kev (who conveniently can not remember saying this) chattered, "Cccaaannn yyyooouuu pppllleeeaaassseee tttuuurrrnnn ooofff ttthhheee fffaaannn??? Like my chattering teeth effect but seriously that is how it was and it was not like I had the AC turned down it was about 83 in the house. This actually pissed me off which I am sure was more because of the lupron because everything that you can think of will push my buttons. Oh well such as life and hopefully it will be worth it. Today I also went to a baby shower of my friend's. Although it is hard seeing all the cute things I am very happy for her and know that she understand what I am going through. (Her RE knocked her up too) Today we also had a craft day at my church which was a lot of fun. My mom drove down from the other side of town and spent the day with me. We made some cute things for the holidays and other things. We also had a service project where we made boxes for an organization down here called Lanee's Legacy. These boxes are delivered to hospitals all around Arizona for Mom's and Dad's who have an angle baby. These boxes are cutely decorated and contain items such as a disposable camera a place to put their baby's lock of hair a necklace for the mom to where and where other items of the baby can be placed. It was really touching one of my friends who lost her baby last year got up and spoke about how special this box was and she could open and look at the items inside. It was very touching and brought tears to my eyes. I am actually thinking about joining the organization so I can be a part of helping mom's dad's that are faced with the death of their baby.
Well that it is all for now, I will keep you updated as to how I am doing and responding to the meds. Next week I go in for my baseline Ultrasound and Blood Work. Oh Yeah!!!
Well that it is all for now, I will keep you updated as to how I am doing and responding to the meds. Next week I go in for my baseline Ultrasound and Blood Work. Oh Yeah!!!
Monday, September 19, 2011
Updates Updates and More Updates
I have been gone way too long and for weeks I have been telling myself that I need to get on here and update. There just has not seem to be enough time in the day and I think I needed to break myself away from it and everyone around it for my own sake. I have kept update with the ins and outs of my friends facing the same struggles but I have been like a silent partner their cheering you on in the background and feeling your pain when things have not worked out. I just needed some time to think. I didn't know if Kev and I were going to get another chance and I was angry and I didn't want to just vent my negativity on others.
So in the meantime I have been venting my negativity into working out and getting into shape. I have lost 15 pounds woo hoo and I feel great!!! My asthma has been so much better since my workout and I am just really proud of myself. However, as of Wednesday evening my working out has been brought to a standstill. I was out riding my bicycle with Kev, (who got a new hand bike so he can exercise now too). Well he still is building up his arm strength and I usually go around our neighborhood once and come back round too him. Anyway, right where the entrance to our subdivision is there is a stop sign and this guy in a truck did a California stop and we collided. I am very fortunate that my injuries are superficial. I did go to the emergency room the next day because my upper abdomen right starting swelling out. They did an MRI on my knee which was also very swollen and bruised and a CT scan on my abdomen because the Dr. was worried about my spleen. After 6 hours in the emergency room everything came back good. They did put a brace on my knee to keep in immobilized and gave me crutches. As soon as the swelling goes down I will be able to go start working out again but he cautioned me to take it easy blah!! If it had to be anyone I am glad that it was me instead of one of the neighborhood kids that live in the area. It really could have been a lot worse!
Now my journey through infertility has seem long to me but I look at many of my friends and my struggles have not even begun to scratch the surface. But in the world of infertility a week can seem like an eternity. For me it has been just over three months since my negative Beta and time has been ticking away. As I have said I have kept myself busy working out, cleaning house, and spending time with family. It has helped. Because we haven't heard anything about whether Kev's workman's comp had approved or denied us another attempt I urged Kevin to call. I think 3 months is enough time to make a decision and I needed to know one way or another so I could make a plan. Jane his caseworker still had not heard back from the lawyers, (this was September 7) but she did not foresee it being a problem and felt we should here something by the beginning of the following week. Well the answer came back two days later and we were approved for another attempt. I don't know if this is the last one and I try not to think about that. Instead I take one day at a time and hope for the best because that is all we can do. I started on my birth control last Thursday. Now we were concern that the accident might delay this attempt but Daina (my IVF coordinator) says as long as nothing is broken or internal damage we can proceed. Looks like my transfer will be around the end of October. Here's hoping that 3 times is the charm.
So in the meantime I have been venting my negativity into working out and getting into shape. I have lost 15 pounds woo hoo and I feel great!!! My asthma has been so much better since my workout and I am just really proud of myself. However, as of Wednesday evening my working out has been brought to a standstill. I was out riding my bicycle with Kev, (who got a new hand bike so he can exercise now too). Well he still is building up his arm strength and I usually go around our neighborhood once and come back round too him. Anyway, right where the entrance to our subdivision is there is a stop sign and this guy in a truck did a California stop and we collided. I am very fortunate that my injuries are superficial. I did go to the emergency room the next day because my upper abdomen right starting swelling out. They did an MRI on my knee which was also very swollen and bruised and a CT scan on my abdomen because the Dr. was worried about my spleen. After 6 hours in the emergency room everything came back good. They did put a brace on my knee to keep in immobilized and gave me crutches. As soon as the swelling goes down I will be able to go start working out again but he cautioned me to take it easy blah!! If it had to be anyone I am glad that it was me instead of one of the neighborhood kids that live in the area. It really could have been a lot worse!
Now my journey through infertility has seem long to me but I look at many of my friends and my struggles have not even begun to scratch the surface. But in the world of infertility a week can seem like an eternity. For me it has been just over three months since my negative Beta and time has been ticking away. As I have said I have kept myself busy working out, cleaning house, and spending time with family. It has helped. Because we haven't heard anything about whether Kev's workman's comp had approved or denied us another attempt I urged Kevin to call. I think 3 months is enough time to make a decision and I needed to know one way or another so I could make a plan. Jane his caseworker still had not heard back from the lawyers, (this was September 7) but she did not foresee it being a problem and felt we should here something by the beginning of the following week. Well the answer came back two days later and we were approved for another attempt. I don't know if this is the last one and I try not to think about that. Instead I take one day at a time and hope for the best because that is all we can do. I started on my birth control last Thursday. Now we were concern that the accident might delay this attempt but Daina (my IVF coordinator) says as long as nothing is broken or internal damage we can proceed. Looks like my transfer will be around the end of October. Here's hoping that 3 times is the charm.
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
BETA DAY
I have not posted since my transfer but to let you all know the time has gone by relatively fast. I suppose going to Vegas 5 days after my transfer helped. I had a lot of fun and got to see the Lion King at Mandala Bay. It was incredible and highly recommend it but this will be the last year it is showing in Vegas!!! I got to spend quality time with my beautiful daughter, her boyfriend, and of course my husband. Now I did take the evil HPTs with me and tested at 7 & 8 days past my transfer. Both were negatives and I had a melt down. Since Kevin didn't know that I even took the tests I had to put on a smile while on the inside my heart was breaking. If it wasn't for my IVF gals I don't know what I would do. They help me to keep my sanity and because of their advice I decided not to test again because it was too emotionally draining. Although I have not tested again I am pretty sure this cycle was a bust. Now I know it is not over until the Beta lady sings but it is a feeling I have. I just feel different than my last cycle and with my last I had a feeling before I got back my second BETA numbers that it was not going to be good. It would be great to be surprised but I need to be realistic. I already talked to Kevin and let him know that I want to do this again. I think the talked help me feel a little better. At least I know that this is not final
I will update later
UPDATE: As expected my Beta came back negative. I am Ok though and I am ready to move forward to my next cycle. Maybe 3 times will be the charm!
I will update later
UPDATE: As expected my Beta came back negative. I am Ok though and I am ready to move forward to my next cycle. Maybe 3 times will be the charm!
Friday, June 3, 2011
FET
So again I haven't posted like I should but with a FET there is not too much going on. Also the joys of having children and step-children make for a lot of activity. My step-daughter Kassie graduated from 8th grade on May 25. Boy was that place packed, my mother-in-law thought it was so strange that so many people would go to this event. But you know when it comes to your kids no event is too small. Then on June 1 my other step-daughter Kandace graduated from high school.
So I have to insert estrogen cream around dinner time and then lay down for about 10 or 15 minutes. The problem was that we had to leave early to get a decent seat so I took the estrace with me & planned on lying down on the back seat. However, the traffic was so bad at the ASU arena where the graduation was taking place that I had to do it while he was driving. My kids were asleep in the back seat. So there with skirt hiked up & underwear to the side inserting the cream. Yep real glad a semi didn't drive by. ;-p
Anyway all went well & the graduation was great. They went through over 500 names in about 30 minutes!!!
Well today was my big day. I was up by 5 since my nerves would not let me sleep. I went in for my 1st acupuncture treatment & absolutely loved. I was so relaxed. While I was waiting for the acupuncturist to come back the embryologist's assistant came in and told us that they thawed 2 embryos. One was doing very good while the other was not.
Our options were:
My comfy position didn't last long while Dr. Craig put the clamp in one of the nurses pressed the ultrasound on my belly causing my bladder to scream in protest. Oh well it will all be worth it in the end if I get a baby or babies several months later. When I was finally allowed to pee. I didn't think I would ever stop. I peed for almost a minute. I actually timed it.
Now I am on Princess status resting up and praying and hoping for the best, wondering if my little beans are doing their job.
One thing is for sure it feels great to be Pregnant Unless Proven Otherwise (PUPO)
So I have to insert estrogen cream around dinner time and then lay down for about 10 or 15 minutes. The problem was that we had to leave early to get a decent seat so I took the estrace with me & planned on lying down on the back seat. However, the traffic was so bad at the ASU arena where the graduation was taking place that I had to do it while he was driving. My kids were asleep in the back seat. So there with skirt hiked up & underwear to the side inserting the cream. Yep real glad a semi didn't drive by. ;-p
Anyway all went well & the graduation was great. They went through over 500 names in about 30 minutes!!!
Well today was my big day. I was up by 5 since my nerves would not let me sleep. I went in for my 1st acupuncture treatment & absolutely loved. I was so relaxed. While I was waiting for the acupuncturist to come back the embryologist's assistant came in and told us that they thawed 2 embryos. One was doing very good while the other was not.
Our options were:
- Thaw another embryo out
- Take our chances & transfer the two I have
- If the one embryo showed complete stop of growth then transfer the one.
My comfy position didn't last long while Dr. Craig put the clamp in one of the nurses pressed the ultrasound on my belly causing my bladder to scream in protest. Oh well it will all be worth it in the end if I get a baby or babies several months later. When I was finally allowed to pee. I didn't think I would ever stop. I peed for almost a minute. I actually timed it.
Now I am on Princess status resting up and praying and hoping for the best, wondering if my little beans are doing their job.
One thing is for sure it feels great to be Pregnant Unless Proven Otherwise (PUPO)
Friday, May 20, 2011
Thoughts of Children
Yes I know it has been too long since I posted. I am a terrible terrible person. Really I have had hardly enough time to breath. Let me tell you, I will be so extremely happy when summer break is here and not just because my kids will be home and I get to spend more time with them. That itself is a big reason because I love being with my kids and now that I am not in school I get bored during the day, Anyways back to what I was saying the other reason is the school work. I am so tired of it. My son who has some learning disabilities and whom we are trying to get back on an IEP so that he can receive the help he needs gets a crap load of homework. I mean he has a book report for reading, a science project for science, a research paper for writing, and a social studies project for social studies all need to be turned in by Monday. He was actually given an extension because his counselor Mrs. Hunter whom I absolutely love has been such an amazing advocate for him getting some modifications on his work. Still there is so much to do and so little time and my son, God bless his is very meticulous in his work which takes him extra long to do. In fact after I get off of here his research paper which has been written out I am now going to type up for him so he can work on and other project. I am exhausted just writing about it.
Well back to the world of fertility which has taken a big chunk out of my daily life. It is amazing exactly what we put our bodies through and the amount of times we do. I get asked why I would want to try again since already have children. Sometimes I feel self conscious because I know there are many women out there that have not yet had the opportunity to hold their own child in their arms where I have been triply blessed to do so. Maybe I am selfish and like the Disney character Sharpay (my daughter is watching High School Musical) I want more!!! I want to add to my wonderful blended family and unite them together. I always do I wanted to have more children and my first husband and I planned on trying again after my son Tristan had started school but life throws curve balls at you. Today is the 8 year anniversary of his death. It is hard to believe that he has been gone so long. I look at my husband Kevin now and realize what lucky person I am to have been blessed with two amazing men when some women don't even get one.
June 3rd is the official day that I will be PUPO!!!! I pray and hope that one or two of my little snowbabies stick
Well back to the world of fertility which has taken a big chunk out of my daily life. It is amazing exactly what we put our bodies through and the amount of times we do. I get asked why I would want to try again since already have children. Sometimes I feel self conscious because I know there are many women out there that have not yet had the opportunity to hold their own child in their arms where I have been triply blessed to do so. Maybe I am selfish and like the Disney character Sharpay (my daughter is watching High School Musical) I want more!!! I want to add to my wonderful blended family and unite them together. I always do I wanted to have more children and my first husband and I planned on trying again after my son Tristan had started school but life throws curve balls at you. Today is the 8 year anniversary of his death. It is hard to believe that he has been gone so long. I look at my husband Kevin now and realize what lucky person I am to have been blessed with two amazing men when some women don't even get one.
June 3rd is the official day that I will be PUPO!!!! I pray and hope that one or two of my little snowbabies stick
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